Have you ever wondered about where your family, your friends and your business partners belong in your life?
The answer is yes - if, and only if, there's emotional maturity in those people. And this is where all the gray zones are created, and you may end up feeling confused.
Let's talk about family members and friendship first.
I see many people feeling guilty about having to get along with difficult family members. They think it's their fault and that they should be doing something about it. My focus on this blog post today is specifically on the family of origin, which refers mostly to your parents and siblings, and closer relatives.
According to the Bhagavad Gita - our family members are inevitable.
They're part of your life. You cannot avoid your family members.
if you're avoiding family (I'm not talking about a second degree cousin, but about your parents and siblings and family of origin), they belong as family members.
They're beyond friendship because their family, right? We can get along with our family members for personality connections, but we don't have to. Knowing they're inevitable, you can settle for that, and not fee the need to be friends. You're not obliged to it.
And make your peace with it.
Can a family member or friend be a business partner, or employee?
I see a lot of people at Ranova who have employed their family members or who are employed by their family members.
This is delicate because, on the one hand, you want to benefit a family member or friend.
On the other,
When there's conflict and turmoil, it means the healthy boundaries are not set -and that the person is emotionally immature.
It means people have common sense and know their place in whatever system they're operating in.
This means immature adults will behave like children in a work environment. They may feel entitled. They may demand privileges. They may be demanding, period. And this can become a mess you really don't need to deal with.
It's the job of the adult, or of the healthy ego, to set the limits in those types of relationships.
So please understand this:
It could even be detrimental to their growth if they're immature and always sheltered by family members, even in social life - where they should be independent.
Does this mean you can never work with a family member? Of course not.
but you need to discern if there's emotional stability and "updated soul timing", or not.
When you're in a business relationship with a family member, and this mainly refers to siblings, parents and children, it's important to be very mindful of people's attitudes. Not rarely, I see children employing their parents when they come for sessions here. This is not "wrong" as a general concept, but we need to be aware of why the relationship is happening that way, because
(for more info on how this works, check out our talk about the three principles of the soul here).
Ideally, things can work out when family members work on the same business
If you're suffering because family members in your business are creating turmoil, something's interfering in the objective energy of business, which is designed to flow without emotional drama or abuse.
These are areas in which we can be more objective and expanded than family life. And when it comes to working with friends, we also need boundaries. Friends are not family members, but we have affection for them, and we can work with them if they have common sense and discern what a professional relationship encompasses.
Again, if there are healthy boundaries and emotional maturity, you don't have to feel guilty about your friends and you don't have to feel like you have the obligation to employ them, or help them in their professional life if that person is unstable.
Another thing people always ask me is if you have to be friends with everybody in your business. A business can be healthy and wonderful, and really objective and mature - and friendship doesn't necessarily have to be involved.
Sometimes this kind of wondering is cultural. Some cultures really don't discern much about what's a family bond, what's a friendship and what's a business relationship, because they often overlap. But these are three very different types of connection that can overlap as long as there is emotional maturity, but they don't need to.
This is actually a good test for you:
This is a question I ask in a loving way - though some may say it's tough love, it's better than pretending someone's not as much of a handful as you very well know, deep down, he or she is - even if it's a family member or a good friend.
If you make business decisions for the sake of caring for others regardless of their behavior and above anything else, please know this:
And for the good and sake of all involved, especially the immature adults you're enabling, it's time to stop doing this.
I hope this was clear, and I'm curious to know - what do you think about this whole family, friends and business situation? Let us know what you think in the Comments Area below!
Thanks for your presence here today, ad I'll see you soon in our next blog post!